What Children Can Teach Parents About The Divorce Process

It is quite normal for parents to worry about their children. Parents understandably often strive to protect their kids from both emotional and physical harm. As a result, it can be challenging for parents to navigate the process of divorce and its aftermath without worrying that the transition will harm their children temporarily or permanently. However, children are very resilient and may be able to teach parents a thing or two about how to approach the divorce process without so much anxiety.

First, understand that kids are quite perceptive. Even at a very young age, they can sense when their caretakers are stressed or are relaxed. If you do not want your kids to worry, the first thing you can do constructively is calm your own anxieties. If you project that things will be okay, kids will begin to believe you even if they will not confirm this idea outwardly.

Second, it is important to show your kids as much genuine love, support and attention as is practically possible. This does not mean that you need to buy your children gifts, eliminate your rules and boundaries or tolerate disrespect. Genuine love, support and attention expressed in healthy ways will go far in ensuring that your children emerge from the divorce process strong and happy.

Finally, children generally want their parents to be happy and to thrive. If you take care of yourself and pursue a healthy, full and engaging life, children will often learn to do the same through your modeling. It is normal to worry about your kids. But by taking care of yourself you will ultimately take care of them too.

Source: Huffington Post, “Parenting After Divorce: 15 Things Readers Say Their Kids Taught Them About Divorce,” Sep. 5, 2013

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